Everyone has a unique life story. There are things that influence and shape your life. Some people call it “fate,” that shapes your future self. Perhaps everything has a cause. However, this still doesn’t constitute your life story. Let’s embark on a journey into your unique narrative and offer a little critique. But first, have you ever watched Avatar: The Last Airbender?
It might seem like just a show, but it’s actually a masterclass in how a life story is written through self-narrative, not just fate. Avatar: The Last Airbender holds a very special place for me. I’ve watched it countless times, and I’ve wondered what made it such a beautiful story, and how I can make my own story worth telling? Let’s consider your past as the lore of your character. If you were the writer, how would you craft your future chapters to turn your life story into a masterpiece?
Crafting a Complete Life Story: Integrating Your Past, Present, and Future Self
When I’m going to watch something, I check if the series is finished; watching an unfinished story isn’t very enjoyable. But why? Because the past and present leave us with questions about the future that need answering. You may not answer these questions as expected, but you have to answer. When a connection is established between the past and the future by answering these questions, it gives us a sense of self-continuity.
Avatar: The Last Airbender feels like a complete story. Not merely because it reached its scheduled finale, but because it masterfully closed certain arcs while leaving others open for the future. This is exactly how a lived life story feels, isn’t it? While crafting our narrative, we don’t truly want a ‘final’ episode; we don’t want death to be the hard stop of our influence. Instead, we seek a sense of resolution. We need to answer the most pressing questions of our ‘past self’ to find peace in the present, while leaving enough mystery to keep our ‘future self’ moving forward.
Finding Peace Within Your Past
Our past, one way or another, shapes us into who we are today. Some of us are crushed under the weight of great traumas, others fall apart, unable to hold onto their regrets. If you believe in fate, you might think there’s a reason for the challenges and memories you’re experiencing. But if you want peace today, perhaps you must create that reason yourself.
If you’ve watched the series, you’ll remember Aang’s crushing guilt. After fleeing his home, he discovers the tragic extinction of his entire culture. He is haunted by the thought that his absence allowed it to happen. Maybe if he had stayed, he could have changed everything. But what does clinging to this ‘what-if’ truly add to his character? Unless you have a time machine, the past is immutable lore. Sometimes, the most powerful act of self-authorship isn’t finding the ‘truth’ of what happened, but finding a reason that allows you to move forward. It’s about choosing a narrative that serves your growth rather than one that anchors you to a ghost.
Reframing Your Past: How the Future Changes Your History
All the memories we have aren’t simply old books waiting for us to access them in our brains. Our past is like a mental map in our minds. Sometimes, how we look at it determines what we see. If you look at your past through a happy window, you’ll find little pearls shining among your memories. If you look at your past through a dark window, the pearls won’t shine. As I mentioned in my other writing, the past isn’t fixed, especially when you’re looking at the past from the perspective of the present.
When you review your life, what do you see? I’m sure many things. But can a writer tell everything? If you were to film your own story, what would you tell and what wouldn’t you tell? This is the most important part of storytelling. And often, when telling a story, because we know what will happen in the future, we extract things from the past that might be related to those things and tell them. That’s why the past is constantly changing, because the future changes.
Imagine you’re a successful businessman. How much of your cooking hobby do you think would be reflected on screen when you tell your story? Almost nothing. But imagine that at some point in your life you quit your job and opened a restaurant. Then all your memories of cooking will shine like pearls on a beach. Then your past will change. And we don’t know the other half of this movie we’re about to shoot. But for now, we can write the prequel with that perspective, depending on how we want the other half to be.
(This paragraph may contain critical spoilers) In Avatar, Zuko was a favorite for many, and so was his redemption arc. The redemption arc is the perfect example of the complex relationship between the past and the future. Imagine writing a character like Zuko. If you want your character to realize their mistakes, you write them mistakes. If they had written Zuko as a character who would never develop, they wouldn’t have shown us his soft spots.
Perhaps you experienced many negative things in your past, perhaps your past is truly a dark night. Therefore, all you need to do is scatter pearls on the beach. Because pearls also reflect moonlight. It may not be enough to turn night into day, but it can help you find your way on the beach without sinking into the sea. In this way, when the sun rises, you will still be on your feet.
Finding Your Purpose: Charting Your Course in the Grand Narrative of Life
You know Toph, the vulnerable child her family protected and shielded. She was secretly a very strong fighter. Did Toph have a goal before meeting Aang? I don’t think so. Like any earthbender, she waited, but she didn’t just sit still. She participated in fighting tournaments while fulfilling the role her family gave her. And when she decided to go with Aang after meeting him, that’s when she found her path.
Are you considering becoming a fighter? Ah, maybe you are. Maybe instead of spending your days debating whether to keep your current job or become a fighter, you should simply enroll in a course. And when the time comes, you can quit your job, or maybe your life story will take a different turn. Maybe you won’t want to be a fighter, but you’ll continue with the course simply because you enjoy being able to defend yourself.
Embracing Your Destiny: The Unveiling of Personal Purpose
If you have a purpose, it will pull you out of the swamp of the past. Let’s say you want to get out of depressive thoughts, become a happier person, and spend more time with your family and friends. Picking up and polishing happy memories from the past will work. But if you also have a purpose, then your present self will try to create new happy memories. When you find more pearls than pebbles on your beach, it’s no longer a rocky shore.
However, I know that not everyone has a purpose strong enough to pull them along. Most of us don’t, actually. In my opinion, a purpose, by its very nature, needs to be something big and something you want to dedicate yourself to. Of course, it has to be big for you. For example, becoming a doctor isn’t a good purpose in my opinion. Because it will only help you until you become a doctor. And since the reason you want to be a doctor isn’t part of your purpose, you might change your mind over time and go in a different direction. Before you know it, you’re back in the same place.
Therefore, your purpose should be strong in several ways. It should make you feel like you’re contributing something to the world, it should be meaningful to your story, and it should make you feel good. Perhaps “becoming a doctor and helping countless people” would be a more beautiful goal than “becoming a doctor.” And perhaps “traveling the world and sharing people’s stories.” would be a more beautiful purpose than “traveling the world”.
For example, I am genuinely very interested in storytelling and its delivery. People’s stories fascinate me. I’ve actually written screenplays many times. If I were to travel the world, which I very much want to do, it would only become meaningful by sharing people’s stories and telling you something about it. Since this purpose is in the back of my mind, my brain is constantly searching for stories. But I can’t just leave everything behind and travel the world, can I? Maybe for now, I should only travel when I have the opportunity. Maybe the stories I find will lead me down a different path.
Also, remember that your purpose can change. But as you move, even if you change direction, you will eventually find yourself in a very different place than where you were. For example, Zuko’s purpose changed completely. But with this new purpose, he found meaning and completed himself. Or perhaps Aang didn’t immediately internalize the purpose everyone attributed to him. But his “purpose of helping people” gradually transformed into a “purpose of saving the world.” Everyone has a different path and story.
Cherishing the Memories: Building the Foundation of Your Story
There are some stories that have fewer characters than average. However, the fewer characters there are, the more meaningful the relationships you should build between them. The characters in your life story should have an important place in your narrative. There are very few stories with only one character. If you’re going to include 3-5 people in your life story, make sure you share beautiful memories with them. It’s not the ending alone that makes a story valuable. Friendships, family, and lovers… they are the ones who truly give the story its meaning.
Aang, Katara, Sokka, Toph, and later… The story couldn’t be just Aang; it wouldn’t become legendary simply because these characters served a specific purpose. Another thing that makes this story legendary is the interactions between these characters. You might be a doctor, perhaps you want to help people. But along the way, you shouldn’t hesitate to create meaningful memories with your friends and family. You never know which memory will be crucial to your story.
Time truly flies. You might lose someone you love, you might move to another leaving a friend behind, or life might separate you in some way. We should create memories with them; their value will increase tenfold when making new memories is no longer an option. Perhaps the pearls you scatter on the beach will be these memories you’ve collected, you never know. Even when Aang and his friends had a goal like “saving the world,” something most of us don’t have, they created meaningful memories at every opportunity. After all, they are children, and they played games when the time was right. We should be children sometimes too. Or maybe always but just a little.
Your ‘Life Story’ – A Masterpiece in Progress
The thing is I think these are what makes Avatar The Last Airbender a good story. And I gave some ingredients that I think makes a good narrative. But I will not give you the full recipe, because I don’t know all of the ingredients. You will need to experiment a bit to make your story. And maybe when you watched Avatar, you just enjoyed the fun fantasy elements of the journey. Then make your life fantastic!
What elements do you think are essential for a life story worth telling? (the only element worth telling is water of course) I’m sure we can learn from each other. And if you keep trying, you will make a perfect story. At least I would definetely enjoy reading it. If you haven’t experienced this masterpiece yet, I highly recommend watching Avatar: The Last Airbender to see what makes a life story worth to live.
“Sometimes life is like this dark tunnel. You can’t always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you just keep moving… you will come to a better place.”
― Uncle Iroh